A deal with the universe

I remember this really funny situation that came up once in a library. You could book these nice study booths that were relatively secluded and good for getting work done, and I tried to make good use of them whenever I could. One time I went in and there was a small group already in my booth. "Hey, sorry", I said, "I have a booking for this booth". One of them replied, "we're already set up here, would you mind just taking that other free booth?" I very nearly said yes, until I realised the trap I was about to fall into.

Here's what would have happened next: I sit down in the nearby free booth, the group in my original booth save the effort of moving, everyone wins. Until fifteen minutes later, when someone else comes up to me. "Excuse me", they say, "I have a booking for this booth". When I explain that I am all set up at this booth and ask if they'd mind moving to a nearby free booth, they say "no, sorry, this is the booth I booked". What? This isn't the deal! I moved for those other people. I didn't have to, but I was being nice! And this is the thanks I get from this jerk who won't even reciprocate.

I call this situation a deal with the universe, and it comes up a lot. You decide that, because you've done some good thing or acted charitably, the universe now owes you. You and it have a deal. It's going to take care of you because you're a good person. You spent your weeknights helping homeless puppies with cancer, but during the weekend your date cancels on you and then you get sick. What the hell, universe? I give you all that and this is what I get in return?

Two things on that: firstly, I hope it should be obvious that the universe can't actually make deals because it's mostly empty space with some rocks and gas, and thus lacks the sentience necessary to engage in trade. The second thing is that the actual parties to these deals are sentient, but do not necessarily have any relationship to each other. This means your date who gets an earful of how good a puppy-saving superhero you are, or the jerk from the library who just wanted to use the booth they booked, are unwitting parties to a bad deal that was made without them.

That's not to say it's wrong to do nice things, but as soon as you start thinking those nice things are a trade you walk into real danger. Even doing something nice for a person and expecting something in return is a recipe for uncomfortable situations and resentment, but doing that when the person you give to and the person you expect from are totally different? There's no way that's going to work. The universe doesn't make deals, and people rarely see themselves as manifestations of some cosmic barter system.

The library situation, by the way? I told them they'd need to move. They grumbled a bit like I was being unreasonable and moved to the free booth. Fifteen minutes later someone else came along and kicked them out of that one too. Thanks, universe!